Jewish liturgical services provide very different services for each event in life. For those in mourning, and just after someone has passed away, a Kaddish service is recited. If you are not Jewish by birth and are left to organize this service, or you are asked to participate in this service, here are some of the requirements for finding and arranging the necessary aspects of this traditional Jewish funerary service.
Make the Rest of the Arrangements with Your Rabbi
The Rabbi will lead the Kaddish every time it is recited with each Temple service. If you and your deceased family member attended Temple regularly, you should feel comfortable enough asking your Rabbi there if he will lead the Kaddish service for your deceased family member. Then the Rabbi will make the rest of the arrangements that are necessary, with the exclusion of the selection of the ten people required to join together to recite the Kaddish prayers and songs.
A Minimum of Ten People Are Required to Conduct the Service
Jewish law dictates that at least ten people are needed for a proper Kaddish. It is preferable if the ten people are close and extended family, but if not enough family members have survived by the time the deceased has passed, close friends of the deceased may be asked to help with the saying/singing of the Kaddish. If you have to ask nine other people to do the Kaddish, do your best to ask family members who are practicing Jews. If you yourself were not Jewish before you married the deceased, then consult with your Rabbi to learn the Kaddish prayers and songs. You will need to recite these during Jewish services for the next year as part of the required mourning process.
If You Are Asked to Participate in the Kaddish...
If you are asked to participate in the Kaddish, find out what you will be doing. Some of the songs or verses in the liturgy are reserved for people who were really close to the deceased. Additionally, if you are not Jewish, or are not a practicing Jew, you will need to brush up on the words to the prayer song(s) that you will be helping to recite. The words are usually in Hebrew, although there may be a few in Aramaic. There is generally a practice or rehearsal for the funeral so that everyone knows their part, especially if non-Jews are joining in on this service.